You’re on your way to authentic negotiating, but there are still some unchecked emotions, fears or preconceived notions holding you back from success. As an Apprentice Negotiator, you have the preparation part down pat – heck, you may even know the other parties’ kids by name – but that doesn’t mean you’ve done the necessary internal work to approach the deal from a place of Clarity, Detachment and Equilibrium, the three keys to authentic negotiating. You may be negatively influenced by frustration, inflexibility, fear of the unknown or an unconscious need to be liked; and, while you don’t utilize dishonest or manipulative negotiating tactics, inadequate self-reflection means you’re often dishonest with yourself, which cripples your ability as a negotiator. Even if you utilize the best negotiating skills and tactics in existence, without the right mindset, you will never effectively achieve your goals.
Authentic negotiating is not a skill, but a state of being! If your state of being is in fear, scarcity, upset, anger or rigidity, you are not going to be successful, no matter how many techniques you employ. Part of getting past these obstacles is doing the internal work to address them and remove their power.
Based on the new book, Authentic Negotiating: Clarity, Detachment & Equilibrium – The Three Keys to True Negotiating Success & How to Achieve Them, here are four ways to start negotiating from a state of authenticity:
- Give yourself time
To attain the level of Clarity required to become a great negotiator, give yourself the opportunity to address the internal issues that are holding you back. Taking a day or even an hour off to step back and give yourself the space to get clear might seem like time you don’t have – but if you want true negotiating success, you need to make it happen.
- Outline your objectives
So, you’ve identified the other side’s objectives – but what about your own true motivations? This is a crucial element that often goes overlooked when preparing for negotiations. Record your objectives, honestly and in detail, to become crystal clear on all of them.
- Identify the obstacles
Now that you’ve taken the time to carefully reflect and outline your negotiating objectives, determine what stands in the way of achieving them – not just external factors, but more importantly, the internal forces. What are the limiting beliefs, fears or other emotions that might hold you back? Study the CDE core framework and the powerful negotiating saving framework (CPR) that Corey describes in the book.
- Define your true bottom line
If you’re not fully connected to your truth, you may be lying to yourself and your advisors about your actual bottom line. This applies to every term in the negotiation, not just money, such as the delivery time of the product, how you’ll get paid, or how long you’ll stay on when selling your company. Defining your true bottom line in a meaningful way and sticking to it is vital – your whole negotiating strategy depends on it!
Find more valuable insight in Authentic Negotiating: Clarity, Detachment & Equilibrium – The Three Keys to True Negotiating Success & How to Achieve Them, or contact Corey to discover how he and his team can help you achieve authenticity in negotiations, business and life.
Click here to download the first chapter of Authentic Negotiating: Clarity, Detachment & Equilibrium – The Three Keys to True Negotiating Success & How to Achieve Them.
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